How to Properly Love a Woman: Part One

This post won't appeal to everyone. Some of you may find the subject matter archaic and sexist. That's okay. You can agree or disagree, you can even create a blog to write about your contrasting viewpoints, just don't send me your arguments. Why? Because I don't care. You have your opinion, I have mine, who's to say which is correct, or perhaps both are wrong. There would be no point getting into a pissing match. Besides it's August, and I never get into pissing matches in August with its unpredictable wind gusts and such. (Advice that I recommend to one and all, by the way.)

And here we go...

Men find women difficult to decipher. Many believe that a woman may not even know what she wants, so how could he possibly figure it out? There may be some truth to that, but, in general, women want the same core elements in a marriage (or longterm relationship).

Over the years I've often heard men speak about the sacrifices they make for their wives. They work hard, give the family a nice home with nice things, yet she still isn't happy. Eventually those hardworking men become apathetic, or worse -- embittered. He can give her every material thing on her wish list, but it seems to only make her nag more, apply more pressure, become more dissatisfied. For the husband, who feels like he's already maxed out with giving, the wife's negative response can be soul crushing. Over the course of time, he'll come to believe that she's incapable of being contented, which means he'll stop trying.

In addition to what money can buy, a man will try to be a good husband by being a great dad. Even disgruntled wives can appreciate the value of a caring and dependable father for her kids. It's easy for the kids to become a safe haven in an unhappy household, which is a major contributor to why we live in such a kid-centric society now. Dealing with the spouse is exhausting, and sometimes you don't want to come home from a draining day at work only to be drained by a critical, complaining spouse. So, when your spouse is no longer a source of comfort and affection, it's common for parents to parlay all their attention and love onto the children. It looks good on the surface, because the couple is too busy with the kid-centric life to focus on one another, which means less fighting between them, and that brings about a false peace. In reality, the lack of fighting only means a growing indifference. I've never seen a healthy marriage that was kid-centric. A wife wants the best father possible for her kids, but she needs a husband above everything.

In short, a man can work two jobs, do all the housework, be dad of the year, volunteer at local charities, and be given the key to the city by a grateful mayor, but his wife can still be unhappy. By now you must think that women are crazy and demanding. Heh, sometimes we are. But there is one thing a man can do that will absolutely devastate his relationship, and this thing will typically go unrecognized, even in marriage counseling. If a husband places anyone or anything above his wife, there's going to be a problem. A biggie-big problem with deep consequences.